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This tag is associated with 18 posts

Old Man Witherbee

They say that deep down through the briar, past the knotted willow, way round by the old oak tree lives a kind old man. Old Man Witherbee. They say if catch him at the right time, when the morning sunlight begins to glisten off of the sweet, hillside dew and if you ask politely, he’ll … Continue reading

Whenever someone says I’ve changed…

Whenever someone tells me that I’ve “changed,” I usually sit them down and show them a video about the caterpillar and how if it didn’t “change” it would never become the beautiful monarch butterfly. Then I put in a video of me, wearing nothing but a cape.

Spiders And Robots Living Together

Is it just me, or is everyone else constantly being swarmed by bugs?  For my regular readers, this isn’t really a new topic.  It seems that every time I try to enjoy the outdoors, I get sucker-punched by a bunch of gnats that have come together in the form of a giant boxing glove. You … Continue reading

A Giant June Bug Wants Me Dead

I had one of the strangest experiences last night.  I woke up and I found lying next to me, not my wife, but a giant June bug. At first I started panicking and hyperventilating.  I noticed that this made the June bug start to stir in his sleep. It fluttered its wings ever so gently … Continue reading

9 Signs Your Cow Is Mad

America’s first case of Mad Cow disease in almost six years was discovered this week in California.  The finding has prompted many people to ask ‘is my cow mad too?’ Here are 9 signs she might be: 9. She didn’t wish you a happy birthday on your Facebook page. 8. Instead of saying ‘moo’ when you walk by, … Continue reading

Hey Bob! Am I Fired?

“Hey Bob! Am I fired?” It was the first thing out of his mouth every morning. “No your not fired, and it’s pronounced boss.” I responded every morning, rolling my eyes in frustration. He had been my best friend for ten years and still didn’t remember my name or how to pronounce boss. We had the … Continue reading

Bridge Over Troybled Water. See What I Did There? Well, Hopefully You Will After You Read This

In the continuing battle between my nemesis Troy and I, I have decided to construct a fairly good-sized moat around my property. If Troy wants to build a fence, that’s fine.  But what he won’t be expecting can’t hurt him.  And what I mean by “can’t” is “can”.  My moat will have the biggest dragon he has … Continue reading

Spring, And All The Preventing That Comes With It

Well, it’s springtime.  Which means I have been working diligently on my lawn to get it ready for the year. A couple of days ago, I applied the first installment of fertilizer for the year.  It is important to get a crabgrass preventer down early on in the season.  Unfortunatly the experts don’t tell you … Continue reading

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