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This tag is associated with 12 posts

3 Cakes That Ruined Presidents Day

February 14th, 2005.  Just one week until my favorite holiday, President’s Day.  I was busy growing my Abraham Lincoln beard and powdering my George Washington wig when the phone rang. Startled, I dropped my wig on the floor.  Powder everywhere. “Damn it!” I shouted. I picked up the phone.  It was my friend Jeff. “Come over … Continue reading

The Lonesome Road

The weary traveller had seen many things in his long, long journey but none compared to the sight of that cabin on the hill with an inviting plume of smoke coming from it’s stone chimney. As the traveller approached the front door, he was greeted by an old soul, the owner of the cabin.  “Folks call … Continue reading

A Culinary Review Of Taco Bell’s Waffle Taco

When it comes to fast-food innovation, there seems to be no shortage of ideas at Taco Bell.  First, there was the black taco, in which the restaurant took a regular taco and put it in a different colored shell.  Then, there was the volcano taco, in which Taco Bell took a regular taco and put … Continue reading

How Nestle’s Dove Chocolate Ruined My Life

A few days ago, I bought a bag of Nestle’s Dove milk chocolate candies, because the store ran out of the chocolate I usually buy. It was the first time I tried Dove chocolate, but once I tried it, I was absolutely hooked, because it was simply the best chocolate I’ve ever tasted. It was not too … Continue reading

My Actual Online War With Pepsi. Real Emails With Real Responses

Below is an actual email correspondence between myself and the Pepsi corporation: May 24th, 2002 Dear Cola Geniuses, For years I have enjoyed the crisp refreshing taste of your fine pepsi products.  It truly is the choice of the next generation, and, as I always say to my family (all Coke drinkers), “nothing beats a Pepsi.”  A massive family feud often ensues, … Continue reading

Vegetable Lasagna

Sara and I have been getting our house ready to sell.  This means a lot of cleaning up and finding things that you haven’t seen in a while. This story takes place during one of those instances.  I was cleaning out my garage when I noticed a structure on the other side of the driveway that I had never been … Continue reading

The Horrible, Horrible Time Angelina Jolie Stopped By The Restaurant

As you may have read, I’ve had the pleasure of running into Actor Brad Pitt on numerous occasions (at my office, at the gym, at the coffee shop, at the gas station). I’ve been careful to document these meetings accurately, so that the ladies would feel as if they were there.  One of our Australian … Continue reading

The Food Critic: A Culinary Review of Taco Bell’s MTN Dew A.M.

There is no ‘off’ position on the innovation switch at Taco Bell.  First, the restaurant set the fast food world on fire, by taking a regular taco, coating the shell in Doritos dust and putting it in a cardboard sleeve that makes the taco nearly impossible to eat.  Now, Taco Bell has invented a new breakfast … Continue reading

Disaster at the Diner

I was lost in the Big City, okay.  I’m not proud of it but I feel I need to be honest. My travels brought me to a quaint little diner on the corner of First and First.  I am not generally accustomed to what goes on in a diner and it was apparent right from … Continue reading

Lactose Intolerance

Customer: Excuse me sir, I am very thirsty for milk and I cannot seem to find your dairy section. Clerk : That’s because earlier today we had a milk explosion and it took out the entire dairy section including cheese, butter, cows, beans, celery, water and your precious milk… sorry. Customer: Oh My! Why don’t … Continue reading

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