I have always been interested in the idea of an afterlife. I often find myself tuning into television shows depicting “terrifying” hauntings. After a few minutes though, I find myself dozing off. Why? These ghosts spend an infinite amount of time haunting people in a boring, clichéd manner. It takes a lot more than a … Continue reading
Some years ago, a girl I was dating had asked for a very popular and hard to come by pair of jeans for Christmas. I had searched store, after store, after store trying to track down just one pair, to no avail. Christmas Eve was finally upon us and I had to opt for a … Continue reading
As the film ‘Life of Pi’ continues to do well at the box office, I cannot help but look at its success and wonder ‘what if.’ You see, I was actually asked by Fox to adapt the novel into a screenplay. Unfortunately, studio executives were not pleased with what I gave them. Below are their … Continue reading
Last weekend, during a visit to the flea market, I came upon a bizarre booth, run by an old Gypsy man. There were all sorts of curious items laid out on the table, including a peculiar box. “How much for this?” I inquired. “Oh, no, I couldn’t sell that,” he replied in a cynical, raspy … Continue reading
When I have finally departed from this world, I hope that I can be remembered for one thing. I wish to be remembered as that guy who was always hoping to be remembered for something. And that I liked falcons.
I bet probably the most frustrating thing for a snake charmer is when you’re about to begin the snake charming process and some idiot in a sports car drives by blasting snake charming music that is way too fast and your snake bolts up to the lid of the basket and is knocked unconscious.
When I was about fifteen years old, I woke up to hear a strange sound coming from the backyard. I went out to investigate, only to find a baby hawk, injured. It had fallen from the tree above and what appeared to be the bird’s mother was tending to it. I watched for a couple … Continue reading
I stumbled forward in the hot sand. Each step further scorched my feet. The sun beat down upon my face like a hammer. My mouth was dry, my lips were parched. I collapsed to the ground. I knew this would be my last day in the desert. Suddenly, a cool soothing relief came over me. … Continue reading
A few years back, I decided to purchase a dog. I had been hesitant in this decision, unsure of how it would affect my pet monkey, Chip Dip. I didn’t want him to feel any jealousy, or as if my attention would now be focused on the new pet. After much consideration and after some … Continue reading
In my recent travels through the World Wide Web (the internet), I came upon a web site featuring a device that spits out story assignments at random. Being as how I am completely out of ideas, I decided to give this mechanism a shot. My critics will be quick to point out that this web site … Continue reading