Todd Daggett

Todd Daggett is a fool. Anyone who tells you otherwise is a fool as well. That or they are really smart but a very good liar. Either way you should probably take some time to get to know them to be sure and then punch them in the throat for calling Todd Daggett a fool. Nobody does that and gets away with it.
Todd Daggett has written 25 posts for Army Of Awesome People

Daddy Daughter Dance

The other night I had the pleasure of escorting my 6 year old daughter to the daddy daughter dance. I was unaware that the dance was a 50’s themed sock hop and showed up in my shirt and tie accompanied by my daughter in a beautiful dress. Driven by our mission to be together and … Continue reading

Lactose Intolerance

Customer: Excuse me sir, I am very thirsty for milk and I cannot seem to find your dairy section. Clerk : That’s because earlier today we had a milk explosion and it took out the entire dairy section including cheese, butter, cows, beans, celery, water and your precious milk… sorry. Customer: Oh My! Why don’t … Continue reading

Lessons In Landscaping Learned The Hard Way – True Stories From 1995 Lawn Boy

If your boss is drunk by lunch and invites himself on vacation with you to your buddy’s cabin and insists on going no matter what you say, here is some advice. Tell him he can go with you and that you will call him later with the address, but the cell phone service is spotty at … Continue reading

Hey Bob! Am I Fired?

“Hey Bob! Am I fired?” It was the first thing out of his mouth every morning. “No your not fired, and it’s pronounced boss.” I responded every morning, rolling my eyes in frustration. He had been my best friend for ten years and still didn’t remember my name or how to pronounce boss. We had the … Continue reading

Lessons In Landscaping Learned The Hard Way – True Stories From 1995 Lawn Boy

If your boss is drunk by lunch and demands to have sunscreen rubbed on his drunken back, don’t laugh at the poor sap that get’s stuck doing it and call him “Lotion Boy”. One day “Lotion Boy” is going to quit and someone will have to take his place.

Lessons In Landscaping Learned The Hard Way – True Stories From 1995 Lawn Boy

If your boss is drunk by lunch time and you are the one chosen to run to the store to buy him more beer, you had better make it snappy or your drunk boss will get very angry. In fact, he may scream something like “A man could die of thirst waiting for (expletive) to … Continue reading

The Lamest Super Power Ever

As a kid I had always wanted to have super powers. I would dream of what it would be like to be able to fly, be invisible or have super human strength. I was absolutely certain that I would develop a super power some day and waited with great anticipation, waking up every morning trying … Continue reading

An Open Letter To Mitten Manufacturers

I have searched everywhere for a comfortable pair of mittens but always come up short on my left hand. It would seem that all mittens everywhere are made for people with five fingers so I am hoping that maybe I could special order a pair for someone like myself with special needs. You see, my … Continue reading

My Kids Make Me Say The Darndest Things

I have said some pretty crazy things in my lifetime, but none as crazy as the things that come out of my mouth when parenting. Below is a sample of things that I have said to my children that I never could have imagined a possible scenario where saying such things would have been necessary. … Continue reading

Once Upon A Bachelorette Party

I was young and low on cash, when two of my good friends decided to tie the knot. In a creative effort to be thrifty and at the same time give the couple a memorable gift, I conspired with the maid of honor to have me be the stripper at the bachelorette party. I figured … Continue reading

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