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Satire

8 Near Disasters At The Founding Of Our Nation

-George Washington was nearly killed when the other founding fathers powdered his wig with gun powder as a prank and then handed him a cigar

SIT DOWN!!!!

-The first draft of the Constitution called for presidential elections to be held every ten minutes on the 8’s.

-The original plan was to make all of the States 3 feet wide and 10,000 miles long

-The founding fathers briefly experimented with a system of government where animals make all of the laws

-Until 1798, any male citizen over the age of 18 had the right to declare war on a foreign nation

-The first draft of The Declaration of Independence was full of profanity and was signed ‘love’ above the founding fathers’ signatures

-As Washington was crossing the Delaware, many of his men kept asking him to sit down because they “couldn’t see”

-5 dollar bills were virtually impossible to spend because nobody knew who Abraham Lincoln was yet

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About Tim Kochenderfer

I'm about yay-high and weigh about yay pounds

Discussion

8 thoughts on “8 Near Disasters At The Founding Of Our Nation

  1. No , that’s not true . I taught history for 35 years , so I know . Only male animals over 21 could make the laws . Where did you get this distorted version ? From the commies ? From Wiki Leaks ? Fox News ?
    As it happened , the Congressional debate broke down after no agreement could be reached on the issue of whether non-domesticated animals could be counted in the vote .
    Please , in the future , double chick your facts before you mislead the reading public . Thanks .

    Posted by Dan Hennessy | July 5, 2013, 7:50 pm
  2. Are you drunk?

    Posted by Kylie | July 4, 2013, 2:35 am

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Pingback: Gen. George Washington; the Original One Percenter? « CITIZEN.BLOGGER.1984+ GUNNY.G BLOG.EMAIL - July 4, 2012

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