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These Cookies Taste Like Donuts

“These cookies taste like doughnuts”. Those were the only words written on the scrap of paper she had clutched in her hand. She lay there in a slinky red dress that was too tight in all the weird places. One would have thought she was sleeping if they didn’t notice the smeared mascara, the knife … Continue reading

“Congratulations Miami Heat!” And Other Status Updates That Will Piss Off Your Facebook Friends

LeBron James & The Miami Heat were crowned NBA Champions on Thursday night and unless you live in Southern Florida, you probably noticed, your Facebook friends weren’t happy about the news. In fact, a sure-fire way of sparking outrage would be to post your hearty congratulations to the team and say their championship is well deserved.  Here are other status updates that are … Continue reading

9 Classic Movies That Could Be Ruined With A One Minute Change

There are hundreds of films that could be considered works of art.  However, like adding a moustache to Da Vinci’s Mona Lisa, or a parrot to the shoulder of  Michelangelo’s David, classic films could be ruined with a simple one minute change. Here are 9 examples: The Godfather – The final scene. Michael Corleone closes … Continue reading

Justin Bieber’s Rider For His Space Flight

Virgin Galactic which organizes private space flights recently announced that Justin Bieber and his concert manager are planning to fly into space on one of its flights.  Because Justin Bieber is used to touring and has a very detailed concert rider listing his demands for the concert venues, his concert manager has made the following … Continue reading

The Horrible, Horrible Time Brad Pitt Stopped By The Pizza Place

Actor Brad Pitt over the weekend stopped by the pizza place where I had stopped for a slice. Being as how I’ve already seen Brad Pitt in person several times, first, when he filmed a movie at my office , again when he worked out at my gym, another time at the coffee shop, at … Continue reading

How I May Have, Once Again, Made Things Worse For Justin Bieber

Over the weekend, I was contacted by Justin Bieber’s people.  They informed me that their client is under investigation for reckless driving after speeding through his neighborhood during memorial day. They had heard that I moonlight as a ghostwriter for celebrities in crisis(Tom Cruise, Kristen Stewart, Nicki Minaj ,Justin Timberlake, Selena Gomez, Psy) and asked … Continue reading

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