I had fallen asleep in bed the night before April 1st while petting the cat as she was curled up beside me. I was awakened in the morning by a barrage of meowing. I wiped the sleep from my eyes, got out of bed and started for the bathroom. As I neared the bedroom door I spotted it. The cat had strategically placed a sizable pile of fresh puke directly in the center of my usual path to the bathroom. “Nice try cat! Maybe next year!” I said out loud, hoping my cat felt embarrassed by it’s failed attempt at an April Fools joke. I side stepped the puke pile and continued on my way. It was about this time that I was reminded that I had fallen asleep petting the cat and that the sleep I had just cleared from my eyes had been unwittingly replaced with natures greatest itching powder, cat dander. My eyes began to itch relentlessly. Blinded by my cat dander induced eye itching fit, I stumbled the rest of the way to the bathroom in a rush to flush out my eyes and end the torture.
When I finally got to the bathroom, the feel of cold tile on bare foot that usually greeted me in the morning had been replace by the feel of warm mush on barefoot. “DAMMIT!! THE FIRST PILE WAS A DECOY!”, I shouted as I slid across the bathroom floor. I tried to catch myself on the toilet, but the cat had anticipated this move and left the lid up. The hand that would have prevented my head from smashing into the metal bathtub sunk to the bottom of the toilet with a splash.
My wife took this picture before leaving for work. I think she may have been in on it.Â
I awoke face down on the floor of my bathroom. My head was bleeding and my left arm was stuck in the toilet bowl. My wife’s cat stood with it’s face inches from mine, it’s head cocked to the side wearing a sinister grin as it let out a laugh like meow.
Well played cat. Well played. This is no doubt payback for last April Fools when I replaced your cat litter with quick dry cement.
Brian Croitori
Jason Gooley
Lindsay Tacia
List of X
Randy Shy
James Miller
Timothy Bruce
Todd Daggett
Ahahaha 😛 Oh how I love cats. *evil laugh*
Posted by pandainslippers | April 7, 2013, 4:57 amThis gave me a very large belly laugh. Sorry it is at your expense. Smooth, sneaky cat…
Posted by dawncrane1113 | April 5, 2013, 10:22 amYour wife s cat is obviously working closely with Tim ‘s monkey …..
Posted by kelsgonebush | April 6, 2012, 11:11 pmThanks for the tip! I just hacked into my wife’s cat’s facebook and it turns out Chipdip was the cat’s roomate at Yale. She told me she went to a community college.
Posted by Todd Daggett | April 7, 2012, 8:21 pmThey went to Yale ?? Geez no wonder they are smarter than the average human 😉
Posted by kelsgonebush | April 9, 2012, 3:53 amthis is the reason i really DISLIKE cats!! conniving little bastards.
Posted by Jennifer (MB & CL) | April 6, 2012, 9:07 pmYou and me both! She cheats at checkers too!
Posted by Todd Daggett | April 7, 2012, 8:31 pmI audibly laughed at this one. Never trust a cat…sneaky bastards.
Posted by becca3416 | April 6, 2012, 1:08 pmThanks! I called my wife’s cat a sneaky bastard once and now I wear an eye patch. Sneaky bastard indeed.
Posted by Todd Daggett | April 6, 2012, 3:24 pmI am not surprised. Even if you insult them… under your breath… three rooms away, they know. Look forward to your posts!
Posted by becca3416 | April 6, 2012, 5:07 pmOh, I’m laughing pretty hard over here. Cats are devious little bastards, aren’t they. But so soft and fluffy I can’t help forgiving them like Rihanna kept forgiving Chris Brown.
Posted by EzraWontShutUp | April 6, 2012, 1:17 amI was brushing my teeth when I read your comment and shot toothpaste out of my nose when I got to Chris Brown. Thanks for the new and excruciating experience!
Posted by Todd Daggett | April 6, 2012, 3:19 pmI smell a rigged photo op! Imaginative though…..
Posted by John McMillan | September 12, 2012, 2:31 am