First of all, I lost touch with my friend Hansel because of you. You wouldn’t permit me to call him.
Below is an example of one of my attempts:
Bluetooth: Call using Tim’s phone, please say the name tag
Bluetooth: Cancel. Returning to the main menu. Ready.
Me: No! Call Hansel!
Bluetooth: Cancel, main menu.
Me: I don’t want the main menu! I want you to call Hansel!
Me: Call Hansel!
Bluetooth: Cancel. Main Menu.
Eventually, I gave up on our friendship.
I was willing to let that pass, but today something happened that left me deeply disturbed.
I was driving to work and had initiated a phone call. You asked me to say the name tag, but I became distracted. A moment of silence passed and that’s when you said it:
Bluetooth: Are you still there?
Am I still there? I’m operating a moving vehicle. Where do you think I went?
If I’m not there, something horrible has happened. It means I fell out, or I had to bail out, or I’ve passed out, or I’ve vanished. There can be no good reason why I’m suddenly not in my speeding car.
I decided to remain silent, and see what you would say next. Finally, your robot voice chimed in:
Bluetooth: Thank you, goodbye.
So, you’re under the impression that I am no longer in my car, which is speeding down the highway, you presume driverless, which clearly would pose a danger, yet, instead of checking with me again, or attempting to contact help, you pretend I’ve dismissed you, so you can whistle and walk away?
Things only got worse when I activated you to demand answers.
Bluetooth: Please say a command.
Bluetooth: Call Angelina
My ex-girlfriend. That was an awkward and uncomfortable phone call and I ended up being the one who apologized.
As soon as I figure out how to create an awkward situation for robots, I’m coming for you.