This weekend, I’ve decided to take a journey to visit a nearby movie theater and watch the movie “The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey”. While I have found the movie to be generally entertaining, there were some parts of it which I have found unexpectedly confusing:
1) Bilbo Baggins decides to write a memoir of his travels and is forced to write on paper when he cannot find a charger for his IPad. The camera then cuts to Gollum who is running away while laughing maniacally and yelling “Payback for my preciosssss!”.
2) Seven of the dwarfs occasionally refer to Bilbo Baggins as “Snow White”.
3) Bilbo and dwarfs get captured by Trolls in the beginning of their journey. However, the travelers realize that their captors are actually Trolls only after reading some of their comments on the Internet.
4) Bilbo stalls the Trolls from eating him and his companions by putting Trolls on hold and playing hold music.
5) When rays of sunlight hit the Trolls, they turn into stones. Specifically, Trolls turn into Emma Stone and Sharon Stone who then immediately get chased away by a horde of blood-thirsty paparazzi.
6) The dwarfs explore the Trolls’ cave and find that the treasure contained in the Trolls’ cave turns out to be huge stacks of worthless Enron stock. At least that explains why the Trolls had been so bitter in their comments.
7) The wizard council spends 40 minutes of the movie discussing raising the debt ceiling before coming to the conclusion that all of their combined magical powers wouldn’t be enough to solve the problem, and their conversation turns to more pleasant topics like necromancy. Also, the elf king says that elves really wish they could help out fighting the Orcs, but they are kind of busy making presents in Santa’s workshop.
8) Bilbo and Gollum play Scrabble to determine which of them will be eaten. Gollum throws a temper tantrum when he finds that he does not have enough tiles with letter “S” to spell “PRECIOUSSSSS”.
9) When Gollum notices that he had lost his magical ring, the first place he goes to look for it is the cave’s Lost & Found window.
10) Eagles come to the rescue of Bilbo and dwarfs who are stranded in the tree. It was very fortunate for our heroes that Philadelphia Eagles didn’t make the NFL playoffs this season and therefore were free to save the lives of movie characters. However, I thought that the Eagles’ effort to draft Thorin and a couple of other dwarfs for the team seemed a little misguided and out of place, because I think the Orcs would have made better offense picks.
Overall, The Hobbit seemed to be a great movie. I’ll definitely have to watch it again to clear up all the confusion.