Film Review: 9 Confusing Moments In James Bond Skyfall

Over the weekend, I had the chance to catch the new James Bond film ‘Skyfall.’  While the movie promises to be a blockbuster, I found much of it confusing.  Luckily, I was taking notes during the entire film:

-It seems odd that James Bond is so out of touch with technology.  When Bond locates a stolen hard drive and is informed that it is ’16 gigabytes’ he seems astonished at the size and radios base for a forklift, a wide-load truck and 7 men to help remove it from the warehouse.

-Rather than his signature ‘Bond, James Bond’ catch phrase, when he meets someone, Bond spends uncomfortable amounts of time trying to remember his name.

-The James Bond films are known for their incredible gadgets, yet the items in this film seem cumbersome and pointless, such as the “cell phone with attached dual cassette answering machine,” the “can of snakes that shoots out pistachios when you open it” and “Windows 98”

-It’s one thing that they’ve changed Bond’s signature drink from a “martini, shaken, not stirred” to a “Pepsi Max, dropped, then shaken” but it’s hard to believe that Bond would seem so surprised and angry every time he opens the bottle and it explodes all over him.

-James Bond would never wear Spanx.  Why wouldn’t they just find an actor who is in better shape?

-What is the point of giving James Bond an intern?  The kid can’t even keep up and disappears for scenes at a time.

-When Bond meets the arch-villain, instead of a really clever catch phrase, Bond’s first statement is a lame “hey, are you the bad guy?”

-Bond’s line when he sits down at the casino poker table “Poker, that’s alright for the ladies, but Ants In The Pants – now that’s a man’s game.”

-Maybe the worst ending in a film I’ve seen.  After a dramatic fight scene, the arch-villain escapes, Bond throws up his arms and says “Welp, we’ll never catch him.” Credits roll.

See my piece on Cracked.com on Casino Royale