It seems as though I have been working 34 hour days as of late. Remember that one time when I wasn’t at work? Yeah, that was sweet.
I am not a fan of working. I would much rather be doing anything else. Like taking a soldering iron and opening up my cheek, for instance.
I really shouldn’t complain because I really do have a great job, but it is still work. Maybe if they called it something different, like “Not Work”, I would be a little more receptive to the idea.
I always thought that working in an office would be the best job ever. Shows like “Office Space” and “The Office” really turned me on to the idea. It seems that the general task each and every day is finding ways to
avoid work. I think I would be good at that. I would hide in my cubicle most of the day and when I had to go somewhere, i.e. lunch or lunch, I would make sure to walk there in a hurry. People walking fast always look like they are busy.
Those of you who do work in an office should be thanking their lucky stars everyday for the fortunate position they are in. When they’re not busy playing solitaire or minesweeper, that is.
P.S. I now realize that the phrase “Work, Schmork” looks as if the “Schmork” part should be pronounced with a hard “O” sound like in “Mork”. This is untrue. It should have been written “Work, Schmurk”. I wish I could go back and change it, but unfortunately I am doing all of this from an old fashioned typewriter. Thanks a lot, technology.
I tried walking everywhere in a hurry, but I walked so fast that every department asked each other where I was going and what I was doing in such a hurry and my boss found out. Now HE walks everywhere in a hurry…
You just have to make sure to walk faster.
I always walk briskly to lunch because someone always steals my breakfast. I am hungry. But I also look busy…busy fantasizing about french fries and burritos.
Mmmm…breakfast of champions.