I’m not sure how many of you know what I do for a living, but I can tell you that it involves taking people to jail.
Last night, I was burning the midnight oil when a call came in. There was someone strutting around naked downtown. The suspect was described as a black and white, mustachioed male wearing a top hat and a monocle.
I arrived on scene and there was the suspect. I got out of my car and blew my whistle. I put the suspect in the back of my car and gave him his clothes, which consisted of an overcoat and pants. I interviewed the suspect. Apparently the fellow had won 1st place in a beauty contest, with a prize of $50. He decided to spend his winnings on a night on the town.
I took the suspect to jail. We went directly to jail but I had to take a detour so I did not pass the giant “GO” sign that had fallen across I-69.
At the jail, the Corrections Officer asked the suspect if he could bond out. The suspect turned out his pants pockets, which were empty. He also gave a strange little wink that seemed out of place in the situation at hand.
We waited for our turn in booking. We were told that we “rolled a 7”, whatever that meant. M. Moneybags was booked into the jail and I was heading back to the city. I took one look back and saw him holding onto the bars of his cell. He had a creepy smile on his face and there was that weird wink again.
As I drove away from the jail in my little metalic shoe, I reflected on the odd nature of that arrest. It was very different than other situations I had been in, yet it all seemed somewhat familiar. On the way back to the city I stopped for a bite to eat and was forced to pay a Luxury Tax of $75, which all seemed very arbitrary.
Well, that’s my story. Now if you’ll excuse me, I just got a call that somebody rolled doubles three times in a row.
Onlineshopping becomes a lot more desirable when we are offered express (and sometimes free) distribution services, and simple return alternatives.
You need to use these together however you can’t use two producer coupons jointly.
I don’t know if you’ve ever noticed…. but if you stick a mustache on the Planters’ Mr. Peanut…. he bears a strange resemblance. Just sayin’
Oh, I know. He was also there as the jail officer. Why didn’t I put that in?
Ha love it mate, very well done.
Well thank you, sir.