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Satire

9 Signs Your Cow Is Mad

America’s first case of Mad Cow disease in almost six years was discovered this week in California.  The finding has prompted many people to ask ‘is my cow mad too?’ Here are 9 signs she might be:

9. She didn’t wish you a happy birthday on your Facebook page.

8. Instead of saying ‘moo’ when you walk by, for the most part, she just ignores you

7. She makes sure she and her colleagues are home extra early, so you can no longer effectively use the phrase “until the cows come home.”

6. Instead of whole milk, she’s really only been giving you about 2%

5. The chickens mysteriously now have a pretty clear idea as to what’s been happening to most of their eggs

4. Last night you used ‘I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter’ and this morning your butter churn was in splinters next to a note that read “I can’t believe you’re not dead.”

3. ‘Moo’ is the most common word in most of your hate mail

2. Insert pun placing extra o’s in the middle of the word ‘mood’ here

1. She still thinks Newt Gingrich still has a legitimate shot at the presidency

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About Tim Kochenderfer

I'm about yay-high and weigh about yay pounds

Discussion

9 thoughts on “9 Signs Your Cow Is Mad

  1. I have more suggestions:
    1. She keeps on peeking at you from a nearby bush as if she was planning an ambush.
    2. The other time u went for milking, you got kicked in your mouth.
    3. She started listening to heavy metals.
    4. She intentionally, wrongly sings ‘I got the moo like Jagger’

    Posted by Creative Donkey | May 10, 2012, 1:41 am
  2. Man this is hilarous… can I draw a comic out of ur Idea? I will attribute u for the idea…. 🙂

    Posted by Creative Donkey | May 1, 2012, 3:50 am
  3. So glad my cow isn’t mad. After reading this, I think she’s just depressed. The only upside of this is that I’ll be getting more blue cheese.

    Posted by EzraWontShutUp | April 27, 2012, 4:24 pm
  4. Let’s make it an even 10: your cow decides to visit McDonalds drive-thru: http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/headlines/2012/04/runaway-cow-visits-mcdonalds-drive-through/

    Posted by List of X | April 27, 2012, 2:04 pm

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