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Satire

Operation: DesTroy – The Next Step In My Feud With The Neighbor

With my enemy Troy at the gates, I have decided that the best offense is a good offense.  So I have decided to give him a taste of his own medicine, NyQuil.

But before I do that, I have to tell you about my latest plan.  I have built a life size replica of myself completely out of driftwood.  My plan is to put this Trojan Me on Troy’s doorstep the next time he goes shopping, or wherever it is a person like Troy goes.  And when he comes home…well, I’m sure you know what happens next.

But if you don’t, let me explain.  You might think that I would be hiding in the Trojan Me and pop out and destroy Troy after he has adorned the statue on his mantle.  That was the original plan, Operation: desTroy.  But, I thought it would be best to take him out one piece at a time.  Starting with his back.

You see, what I have done is I have filled the statue with pieces of gold, a very heavy metal.  When Troy tries to pick it up, his precious back will be in for a big surprise.  And he will be stuck with this giant hunk of wood filled with gold, and……..oh shoot……..I think I have made a huge mistake.

I should have also filled it with little pointy diamonds.

shit.

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About Jason Gooley

Thank you for your interest in me. Where do I start? Well, I guess I'm made up of about the average amount of cells. Let's see...2 arms, 2 legs...Yeah that sounds like me.

Discussion

6 thoughts on “Operation: DesTroy – The Next Step In My Feud With The Neighbor

  1. Ill be waiting ………… ;D

    Posted by kelsgonebush | April 12, 2012, 8:49 pm
  2. lol. will the ‘trojan me’ look like the wooden beaver in the pic? :}

    Posted by superdefective | April 4, 2012, 1:29 am
  3. Haha great idea ! You can leave a wooden statue filled with gold on my doorstep anytime ;D Oh and dont forget the diamonds !!

    Posted by kelsgonebush | April 3, 2012, 11:26 pm

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Pingback: Bridge Over Troybled Water. See What I Did There? Well, Hopefully You Will After You Read This « Army Of Awesome People - April 10, 2012

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